Mary

I'm thinking of changing my name to Mary and only consuming Bloody Mary's for the rest of my life. Think about it - they've got fruit, vegetables (the celery, and some would say, the tomatoes) and the all important alcohol that has apparently become necessary in my day-to-day life.

That's right folks - I'm drunk and it's 11:45am. The team went to the pub at 10am for a drink to celebrate the fact that one of us had the balls to resign.

So, if I changed my name to Mary, this would mean that it would be vital for me to consume a Bloody mary for breakfast every day. Intriguing concept, I think you'll agree.

Now if only I'd have brought a valium to work with me today... I could have done a double header: Prescription Drugs + Alcohol = Mary.